Okay, when I think of timeless design and endless love, I don’t think any of the following words: Las Vegas, dice, casino, rockabilly.
Tragically, the couple whose wedding reception was this week’s Design Star challenge didn’t feel that way, and thus a hellish red, black, lavender and white wedding was born, designed by the most irritating contestant of all, Robb, who observed when the challenge was announced, “I’ve never done a wedding before.”
It’s my most fervent hope he never does another, but given that the judges keep not sending him home, I don’t think that hope’s going to be realized any time soon.
Last week, one of this season’s two gay contestants, Santa Barbara wedding and event planner Scott Corridan, got canceled, which is an irony and a shame because I’m very sure that this tragic design could have benefited greatly from a nice gay wedding planner like Scott. The queer sensibility was left up to the always-sparklicious Josh Johnson, and for my money, he’s the one I’d have hired to do my Vegas wedding if, one, the laws of our nation were changed to recognize my right to marry, and two, I were drugged and forced at gunpoint to get married in Las Vegas.
But this isn’t about my big lesbian wedding, it’s about Stephanie and Bruno’s big traditional fairy tale princess rockabilly Vegas casino wedding. The remaining designers had one night to come up with a presentation for the happy couple, and all the designers pull an all-nighter so they'll be ready for the 6 AM presentation.
Each designer presents his or her idea to Bruno and Stephanie, who rank the presentations and choose the one they want for their actual wedding reception. Christina, who I’ve never been wild about, had been appropriately horrified at the groom’s rockabilly casino idea, and did what smart wedding planners have been doing for generations and ignored the groom and focused on giving the bride the fairy tale white and lavender wedding she’d asked for. I’m sure it was totally unprofessional of her and it got her booted off the show in the first ten minutes, but I went from finding her annoying to shouting “You go girl!” just in time to see her, well …. Go. Sigh. This show hates me.
This was the moment I had a very bad feeling about our boy Josh, who is not looking as sparkly as he did when the show began. The bride and groom don’t seem enamored of his presentation, and I couldn’t get a feeling for how it was supposed to look from the camera angles we were given on it.
