I left at 17 to go to college, then grad school and then law school.  By the time I really connected with my parents aside from telephone calls and visits on holidays, the topic never came up.  I never came out to them, it was sort of an unspoken acknowledgment.  I had lots of male friends and they just stopped asking about girls and I of course was never curious about girls.  I had dated in high school, but then realized, who am I kidding.  I had been having sex with some of my friends since about age 12.  Most of them are straight and I am not.  We are who we are, and if we accept it, that is the only important thing.  Just be patient with your parents.  After all they had to be patient with you when they toilet trained you and taught you all the other things to get you where you are.  Forgive them this shortcoming. 

My parents always talked about how I was "such a good boy" and "so kind and thoughtful". I knew my parents loved me but with my dad I think he was afraid that I was to "sensitive" and therefore easy prey.  He is still protective at times, I almost had to pull him off an ex boyfriend who didn't know who he was and made a derogatory comment that he over heard. He gathered from what was said that I dumped the jerk but he told me that he did care who the man was no one spoke to me that way.  It doesn't help that my dad is a 6'3 former marine and I am a 5'6" social science geek. 

I think he always thought he was going to have to protect me from the world but then 4 years ago all 4 of my grandparents died within 8 months of each other and I think as he watched me take care of everthing, and everbody who needed it, he realized I might be a nice person but I was stronger than he ever thought.  He knew how close I was to my grandmother, his mother, and how I handled all the details he couldn't.  He saw he holding our family together when he and mom were falling apart. Our relationship changed after that and I saw his respect for me as a man grow.

I think that maybe what your parents mean but can't find the words to express.  They are afraid for the little boy they still see in you.  Just be yourself, be respectful and kind to them, but never allow anyone to control who you are and they will come around.

Sure did.  And as evidenced by my avatar photo you can see how successful it was.

Naw man, with my two younger brothers beeing deemed "110% boy!" by my grandfather, and me being labeled as "too poetic" to inherit the family business, I was the freak in my family, not fitting in with my 4 sisters, not fitting in with my brothers.    And the thing is that I'm about as feminine as I am masculine.  I'd just as soon punch a guy in the jaw during a fight as cut his face with my nails.  I'd just as soon shut up with the talking and SOLVE THE DAMN PROBLEM as I am to want to lean on a shoulder and cry.I'm am constantly finding so little place for me in this dumb ol' binary society we've got, when I feel more like I fit in just as well in both places.

But that didn't stop them from pulling me from dance to put me in t-ball.  C'est la vie.

Best luck and wishes to you in navigating your own path through their expectations!!  I believe in you!