Nine Questions With Comedian Billy Eichner

Comedian Billy Eichner has been making a name for himself in New York City for quite some time. A 2005 New York Times article called his late night fake talk show Creation Nation co-starring Robin Taylor "a theatrical phenomenon", and with subsequent appearances on Bravo's A-List Awards and The Showbiz Show with David Spade, Billy has kept bringing the funny ever since.

Billy has two shows coming up at Joe's Pub in Manhattan on November 23 and 24th and we recently threw some questions at the jokester to make him bring the funny on command. 

1) Rosie, Ellen, Wanda or honorary gay Kathy Griffin? Why?
Ellen, because of the four listed here, she's the one that looks most like a chicken. Second place goes to Jay Leno, who looks like a lesbian. Third place goes to Wanda Sykes, because she's the only black person not in "Precious".

2) Who inspired you to become a comic?
I thought going into stand up comedy would be a great way to meet lesbians.

3) If you were a Muppet, which Muppet would you be? Which Muppet would you date?
I think Kathy Griffin looks a little like a Muppet. So if I was a muppet I would be Kathy Griffin. And I would want to date Gonzo even though I think he's HIV positive and I'm not. We would figure it out.

4) Gay female comedians such as Rosie, Ellen and Wanda have shown it's possible to become huge stars. Why has no gay male comic risen so high?
I talk about this in my show, which everyone should come see at Joe's Pub! The comedy world is more or less dominated by aging frat boys who like to hire their aging frat boy friends and maybe one or two girls they want to stare at while they write fart jokes. That said, a change is coming and I'm the Harvey Milk of comedy, baby, so look out Hollywood! The time is now! Please don't shoot me!

5) What's the funniest knock knock joke you know?
There's a knock knock joke where the guy knocking on the door has a midlife crisis. It goes: Knock, knock. Who's there? (long pause) I have no idea.

6) Is the stand-up world as homophobic as we frequently hear?
Homophobic! No way! Are you kidding? There are so many opportunities for us! For instance, once every 6 months they let Mario Cantone on The View! Isn't that nice? Granted Barbara Walters usually wears latex gloves that day, but still.

7) Write a tweet demonstrating Billy Eichner's sense of humor.

8) What's the best joke you've ever written?
I'm not sure. But I have always believed that, with the exception of Jessica Alba's career, everything happens for a reason.

9) You take on closeted celebrities in your stand-up. What's your position on outing?
I have no problem outing people. Especially the ones that pretend to date the opposite sex. It's the next shoe to drop. Can you imagine the uproar if Eddie Murphy insisted he was a white man? It's exactly the same.

Staying in the closet implies there's something shameful in being gay or that it puts you at a professional disadvantage. Which it might - but only because people insist on staying in the closet! It's a vicious cycle. And that's directed not only to the Nutty Professor but to all the Klumps. (And you too, Bunsen and Beaker!) Seriously though - Will and Jada Pinkett Smith? Are you kidding me? I'd be surprised if Jada Pinkett Smith didn't use a urinal.

The dates of Billy's next shows are November 23 and 24 at 9:30 at Joe's Pub in New York City. $20 Tickets can be purchased here.